Mitch - Not Buchannon

Mitch was the most stable of us growing up. Little did we know things would take a massive turn around when she returned from a 6 month round the world trip.


Growing up Mitch had a steady boyfriend, Terry (very hot!), from the age of about 15 until she was 19. From then things didn't really go down hill, she muddled along through uni and did the same afterwards until deciding to go travelling.

On her return I think she had some kind of mid-life crisis (hopefully not actually "mid" life though or life wont be too long) and decided it was time to settle down....she was only 22!! So anyway, she settled (yes settled - she could've done a hell of a lot better!!) for the first boy that came along! He was bad for her! Things went ok with Tom to begin with and they moved in together (later Mitch would actually confess she knew she shouldn't move in with him and she didn't want to, but she said it just felt like the next thing that was supposed to happen). To start with things were good, she enjoyed "playing" house and they were getting ok okay. Cracks started to show when he hit the bars every night though and she just stayed home. She secluded herself from the rest of us - wouldn't answer calls, return emails or texts, but because she had always told us she was ok and things were good with Tom no-one suspected a thing!

That was in the August 2007. I kept texting every few weeks, as I do with most of my friends if we're not in regular contact, but it wasn't until Valentines day 2008 that I actually heard back. And it was bad. Mitch's mum actually text me back and explained what had happened. I guess Tom had been mentally abusing her, it started by calling her fat and in the end he was telling her she was disgusting and had the body of a 7-year-old boy! Tom is the most disgusting man I have ever met (and in general I love men!!!). Mitch's parents moved her out of the house (they gave her no choice) weighing 4stone 9lbs! We met at a bar and talked for hours. On the way home I cried. It was terrible! I've never seen anyone like that before! You could see all of her joints. On her shoulders you could see the skin creasing into the ball/socket joint. I felt ill and I felt terrible she had been through it all by herself.


Ok, yet another depressing story out of the way

You'll be pleased to hear that she is on the road to recovery (and I'm quite excited to reveal the details - I'm laughing as I type this - of her first sexual encounter post Tom!).

Again, I promise things will lighten up and brighten up after the history lesson is out of the way!

jen x

Miss KP, where to begin!?

I met KP in the first year at secondary school when we were 11, by the age of 12 we were best friends (it wasn’t always so peachy).

At 14 we (the entire bad crowd, not just the 2 of us) were already going out to bars and clubs (this isn’t as bad as you would think as our legal drinking age is 18 – we looked older than we should’ve). Also, our parents were aware and as long as we were at the pick-up point at the time they told us to be everything was good. Ok, so you may think our parents were irresponsible, but actually we were quite a sensible group and only did what we wanted to do – we weren’t the easily lead type! Plus, for my parents anyway, they had tried everything in their power to sort out my sisters crazy behaviour and none of it had worked so I think when it came to me they figured they were better off to keep me on side.

Anyway, our parents pretty much let us do as we pleased (I think this must’ve been agreed between them) but there was always a condition or constraint (i.e. you can go out but we will pick you up at such and such a time).

…and so, the debauchery began

KP and I both lost our v-plates (much the same as “l-plates” but not for driving) before we hit 15, yes pretty young! Looking back it was pretty bad and I definitely wouldn’t want a child of mine (not that I currently have any) – it wasn’t particularly glamorous.

Ahh, I have this terrible habit of going off in a totally different direction! We’ll get back to the “first time” another day when I have nothing to blog about! I’ve also developed a terrible habit of turning posts into novels! I wonder how many posts I need to do for my writing to actually be novel-esque!?

Ok, back to KP

KP was, and is, a serial dater. Growing up she had 1 main boyfriend, we’ll call him Burt. They were forever breaking up and getting back together again. On reflection they were really bad for each other! In between broken up episodes KP had numerous boyfriends, flings or whatever you want to call them. KP and Burt broke up for good when she moved to Sheffield for uni after school (N.B he was 3 years older than her, in a dead-end job and going nowhere fast – but he was a lovable rogue!). A couple of years later we discovered he had in fact had a baby with someone else whilst with KP – that definitely took a reunion off the cards!

Long story short

KP moved to London to work for an international foreign language school (she speaks fluent Spanish and French) a couple of years ago, following a promotion she is now in charge of one of their UK schools and is due to move to her new city this week!!

Sorry for all the rambling – I’m just trying to do a quick recap on the past (but for me quick turns to slow and dragged out quite easily – must improve!) so I can cut to the present without having to do a lot of backtracking!!

Introductions - A Helping Hand

OK, so here's an overview of my 'characters' - I will fill the main few in now (but as it's 3:22am and I can't seem to think properly) and every time I post about another friend I shall add their info down here too!

Jen - That's me! I am the secret keeper and a friend to most I'd like to think - but you can't please everyone! I have a lot of secrets of my own, not necessarily because they're really bad, but for me I've always thought that old saying "a problem shared is a problem halved" was wrong and it should actually be "a problem shared is a problem doubled"...this will become clearer as my secrets come out!

Mitch - Bless her! Mitch has been my friend since school, she joined when we were 16 so she was bit of a latecomer! She was bright, bubbly, funny, beautiful, exciting, vivacious, exotic and everyone wanted to be her friend...She was also everything you'd want to be until last year. The previous year she met, and moved in with, her BF, let's call him...actually, let's just use his real name...Tom. Tom was pretty nasty and with Mitch's self loathing spiralling out of control she became anorexic. On Valentines Day 2008 Mitch weighed in at 4st 9lbs (65lbs) - for a 5'5" 24 year old that is pretty terrible! The road to recovery has barely begun so I'm guessing you can figure out some of the issues that'll come with Mitch.

Bex - Bex was my roommate at uni. We had some of the most amazing and hilarious times together, we were quite a bad pairing and were forever getting each other in to trouble. Bex is a confident and beautiful dancer as well as other things.

KP - Possibly the funniest of the bunch. Miss KP has recently taken the plunge with a new job, new responsibility and a totally new city! Not knowing a soul in her new town I'm sure she'll have some stories!

Toni - I've only known Toni for a short while, maybe 12 months, but she is an incredible girl. She has had severe depression since the age of 13 and I think she deserves a medal for coming this far. She's only 22 yet is extremely wise...although clearly not on everything or she wouldn't be on here! There's a chance I will cave and tell Toni about this blog so I thought I may as well use her name!

KPC - AKA BF. KPC stands for "Kung Pow Cow". KPC is a black belt, a surfer and my best friend!

This is all sounding a bit miserable, but trust me it isn't. I have have put a bit of a dull spin on things, but mainly because I have my first post for each in mind and they aren't pretty. A lot of things seem to have happened recently and so there's been a lot of advice flying around. I'm amazed I ever get any work done!!

...and we begin

Let's Get Started

I would like to consider myself a good friend. For the first 25 years of my life I have been confided in, I have listened, I have give the appropriate responses, I've been thoughtful and not given my blunt and honest opinion, I've been very aware of "the real issues" and not just the problem I've been presented with, I've kept secrets and I have been a good friend! So, I can hear you yell...

What's wrong with that?

Well, you would be right to ask! After 25 years of keeping my opinions to myself I've decided to share them with the world. Have you ever felt like someones life is getting so ridiculously out of control you might explode if they tell you one more unbelievable story and you just have to nod, be patient and give some good (yet not always 100% honest) advice?

Just lately I've found myself becoming inpatient with my friends and to be honest I would really rather not. I love my friends to pieces and I don't want to get annoyed with them because I definitely get that it is so much easier to give advice than take it...but come on girls, how many times will you let him cheat on you (etc etc)??

I'm hoping that being able to share the secrets of their lives with you will stop me from being irritated by my the lovely ladies - friends shouldn't be irritating! On the other hand, maybe it's just me, maybe I'm just becoming intolerant in my old age - we'll see!

My 2nd reason for this blog

I already have an un-anonymous blog somewhere else but it's sort of topic related and recently I've found it a bit difficult to blog there as I can't really blog off topic - well, I know I can, but there's something stopping me! That something could be the fact that my parents & friends do occasionally stop by there to check-in!

Since reaching quarter of a century I've become a bit nostalgic...yes,it's true, I have in fact squeezed a lot of 'stuff' into those first 25 years of my life and I really wish I'd been introduced to blogging when I was about 14! It would've made for interesting reading for the 25 year-old me!

I digress - So anyway, whenever my friends and I actually get to meet up the one thing you can guarantee we end up talking about is the past, boys, school, uni, jobs, boys, boys, bla, bla and bla. It's always the same, yet every time we remember something new! So, when I have no secrets / whinges for you I shall be delving into my own personal archives for something juicy for you. I am a little concerned because we were a bit of a bad crowd when it came to some things...but for us it was all harmless (I actually laughed out loud when I wrote that) fun and we loved every minute.

I endeavour to not regret a single word I write (unless it's a typo from my sometimes dyslexic fingers) and if something offends you I would encourage you to either give me a second chance, to redeem myself, or avert your eyes and find another fantastic blog to read.

Over and out for now.

jen x



Next Post - Introductions